With 'given up attempting to comprehend' meaning 'what the flying fuck' and 'you' being 'the people at the district office in charge of hiring new teachers'.
Now, I understand that money is tight right now. I can understand (kind of) not getting a new teacher to replace the one that is retiring. I can understand taking transfer teachers from other schools to fill the roster before hiring new people.
On behalf of my mother:
My mother is exceedingly over-qualified for the positions open. She has a masters and PhD in Agronomy, and another masters in secondary education. She has been a substitute teacher going on five years now, because apparently no one wants to hire teachers.
There were two High School Science jobs open in the district.
You gave them to a pair of college kids - not fresh graduates, but kids still completing their degrees. They graduate this spring.
WHAT. Fail, LPSDO. Fail.
On behalf of my German Teacher:
You pulled this shenanigans last year, you rat bastards, and it didn't work then. Except now you're pulling it harder.
German I: Two classes of 15-20 kids consolidated into one class of 35-40.
German II: Stays the same.
German III: Smushed into the same room as German IV, both being taught simultaneously by one teacher.
Extra Plan Period: Study Hall Supervisor.
And then she's sent half-way across town to teach German IV at another highschool, which gets rid of one of her plan periods. So. One plan to prepare for and grade five separate classes, with a twenty minute drive twice a day.
I do not blame you for retiring instead, Frau.
On behalf of the entire Forensics team:
We have both the best Speech team and the best Debate team in the entire State. Debate has won state speech for three years running, and regularly to exceedingly well in both CatNats and Nationals. They went those first two years without a coach. So. This year, you finally get them a coach - a really good one, at that. They do amazingly.
Obviously the logical thing to do is to get rid of the debate program in its entirety. Obviously.